Well, you could say its been a while (:

I can honestly say i forgot i had a blog until today. I guess since i have a "real" job it hasn't exactly been at the top of my prority list, i'm very sorry. haa.

I guess you could say quite a bit has changed since my last post.

First i can tell you i am not nearly as stressed out and aggravated with people in my  life, and you could say thats good news! I've made new wonderful friends with people i have known for a long time, just never took the chance to get to know. and i'm glad i took the chance to get to know them because they are wonderful people who i have a feeling i'm going to share a summer full of awesome memories with.

I could aslo say that i have finally started to grow a thicker skin, i guess with travis saying it in my ear over and over and over agian it finally started to happen. And after taking his (and everyone elses) advice about not letting it everything get to me so much, things have actually gotten alot better! i'm happy happy with the way things are going. and that could be another reason why i havent been blogging. i tend to vent in my blogs, and when i dont need to vent, i dont blog. i should probably work on that.

I have three babies (not real babies...racoons). They have taught me i do not want kids for a while.

AND we did new pictures yesterday...you can check them out at outoftheelement.blogspot.com (: or on my facebook. i love them and can't stop looking at them!

Where's the line?

Where do you draw the line...of making yourself happy and pleasing others. I'm at the point in my life, and i am fully aware of this, that the decisions i make will shape my future. I'm tired of having to please people, and making decisions so that i don't hurt certain people's feelings. Do people seriously expect me to make myself unhappy so that they can be happy? and things can go back to "normal".

My feelings are hurt too. And i know that i have hurt feelings...and for that i'm sorry. I truly am.

I want people to be happy for me...this is supposed to be a happy time in my life. And i am so THANKFUL for my friends and family who are standing beside me. And for the ones who dont, or dont understand...well you dont have to answer for what you think are the mistakes im making in my life. Things could be back to normal, i'm not stopping that...but people have to let go.

i am marrying the love of my life. and i cant wait. im beyond happy...he's been my rock through all of this. he has stood beside me and supported me. and i cant wait to spend the rest of my life with him.

My wish is that one day, everyone who ever doubted me will realize that i'm okay now and i will be in the future. I'm not a kid, i know the decision i am making and the impact that these decisions will have on the rest of my life. I hope one day they will accept me AND travis for who we are. and realize that no matter how hard you try you can't force someone to be who you want them to be.

But looking over this ENTIRE situation, who's showing the love of Christ? Who's loving like Christ despite the problems and issues that they think they see? I think EVERYONE needs to think about that....

Blogs should come with warning labels.

So i came across a blog that re-caps what happened on the bachelor. And since i missed the secon half of the show last night i thought i would read it. I didnt even get through the first paragraph and the stupid girl blogging blabbed about who gets the final rose! and other details too that i wont share with you because some of you might actually like to wait till the finale to see who wins....kinda like i did!

But i'm threw with watching it this season.
im disappointed. and i no longer like jake.

i want ali to come back :(

So that is why i think that all blogs should come with warning labels, something along the lines of "if you dont want to know who wins dont read this!!" --so girl blogger who ever you are...thanks for ruining it!

And now i am going to go back to my dreaded tuesday that i hate so much. I have a pile of math hw due in an hr that i havnt started yet, and all i want to do is go tan, then go home and take a nap! yes, that sounds wonderful right about now!

Quotes (:

I've learned alot. I've learned to just accept the things that are given to me in life & not question things to much. I've learned you have to make mistakes in order to learn from them. I've learned that you can't depend on anyone but yourself, so in the end all you really have is yourself. And i know that whatever doesnt kill you will only make you stronger.

You'll never know how strong you are until strong is the only choice you have left.

Life isnt about waiting for the storm to pass, its about learning to dance in the rain.

It's not hard to make decisions when you know what your values are.

Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn’t.

Happiness will never come to those who fail to appreciate what they already have.

If you're not willing to risk it all then you don't want it bad enough.

The truth of the matter is, if you have to stop & ask yourself, "is it really worth it?", it probably isn't.

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things that i cannot change, the courage to change the things that i can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

Being happy doesn't mean everything is perfect, it just means you have decided to look beyond the imperfections.

Worry is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do, but it will never get you anywhere.

Don't worry about the people in your past; there's a reason they didn't make it into your future

Where did 19 go?

Well yesterday i turned 20! Thanks to EVERYONE who called, texted or wrote on my fb, you all made me feel very loved...i had an excellent day(: I'm pretty sure my friends tried to make me gain 20 pounds by bringing me all kinds of yummy treats.

And as exciting as it is to be out of the 'teen' years...its kinda sad too i think. Looking back now i can officially say that 19 was the craziest year of my life. SO much happened, but i dont regret any of it because it made me who i am today. I you would have told me on my 19th birthday where i would be at on my 20th i probably would have laughed at you, but isnt that how it usually works? For all of those who know me well know how crazy insane fun and at times stressful this past year has been. And i am super excited to see what this next year has in store for me!

Wanna know why? Please Read below...

Normally, when i blog i try not to put TO many details into them, so that in the case that someone was reading it, they wouldnt exactly know what i was talking about unless i had previously told them. Well today that is going to be a little different. (I have happy stuff coming after this little vent so if you dont care to hear me vent please scroll down!)

Let me begin by giving you this quote to read: "People take different roads seeking happines. Just because they aren't on your road, doesn't mean that they have gotten lost."

I have had my fill w/ people. I deleted a number of people off my facebook and if you are curious why feel free to ask, i dont care about explaining at all. Here is what triggered it...

Well alot had been building up...i find it REALLY funny that a person i used to consider my good friend felt the need to talk about me to other friends. So you dont like who i'm dating, you dont like i didnt listen to your advice, and you obviously dont like i have new friends and that im not going out of my way to be friends with you anymore. I dont feel as though i should be the only one working on a friendship...everyone has cell phones...that take calls and recieves them. I was tired of making the calls. and my final straw...since when is someone "turning into an emily" a bad thing? So refer back to my previous post, im deleting negative people who bring me down and not lift me up out of my life. and that is exactly what i did, i do not feel that they should have the privledge to see (& judge, even though they can say they arent) what and how i am handling my life. and i have to say, as much as i miss old memories and wish deep down there could be more...im happy. which leads my to my next portion...

I love my friends, AND my boyfriend (:
I have had more fun in the past five months than i think i have like...in a LONG time. Its awesome to just be able to hang out...and have friends that are nice and fun and want to be around you too. i think thats what i've been missing for a while. Things are going good for me...or thats the way it feels at least. I'm a happy happy girl! Which makes this other stuff going on seem so pety and pointless. Why do i stress over people who dont really care, when i have alot of other people who actually do! Which is why i deleted people...and which is why i will never mention it agian after this post (: I know who reads my blog and who doesnt...so hopefully this answered some questions for some of you. Everyone knows how to get a hold of me...if you would like to talk about anything ya'll know where to find me!

GOODBYE! (:

bye-bye negative people.

So today, i have come to a decision.
I am saying bye-bye to negative people in my life.
People who pull me down, instead of lift me up.
People who could care less about what is going on in my life.
People who doubt me and my decision making.
People who dont care to call.
People who dont care to speak.
I am tired of worrying about it, and wondering why.
I just can't let these people get to me anymore.
I am happy, and thats all that should matter.
All of their negative-ness will come back and bite them in the butt one day.
but i CAN do what i set my mind to..and i am super glad to prove you wrong everyday when i do something you always said that i couldnt do.

So i am going to surround myself w/ my real friends (:
The ones who are there for me whenever i need them, when some people said they wouldnt be.
I've come to the conclusion that people do change, and sometimes not for the better.
But TRUE friends will be by your side no matter what.
And i am HAPPY happy HAPPY that i have finally come to this conclusion.
and i am absolutely amazed at how relieved i feel.

So if you would like to cut out the negative people in your life and want to stop w/ their drama and games, you have to seperate yourself from them.
Someone can't play games with you if you dont play them back. Its like when I was a kid, I would always complain to my mom about some kid chasing me on the playground...and she would say they cant chase you if you dont run. Same general idea...If you continue to LOOK for drama in your life, you will find it. Instead, turn your back to it. It can't chase you, if you arent running.
(: