its almost 2010!

So its almost 2010! I just got to thinking about that. SO MUCH has happened in my life this year. And i feel the need to recap the past 12 months...I have learned so much looking back.

So lets start w/ January of 2009:
I rung in the new year at Travis' house (ironic huh?). Around this time i was over there alot, at fires and such, however i completely blew him off everytime he tried to get me to let him take me out...I was to hung up on things that had been long over that i didnt want to let go of. However it is all about timing right? So lesson learned looking back: Sometimes there are really good things right in front of your face but you'll miss whats standing in front of you if you are to busy looking back.

February 2009:
I turned 19! woo hooo (: haa.

March 2009:
Still caught up on things that i shouldnt have been...

April 2009:
STILL caught up on things i shouldnt have been...

May 2009:
and STILL caught up on things i shouldnt have been. Except this month was a little different, i was given reason to hold on a little longer. Lesson learned from the past three months: guys will be guys. you cant 'guess' what they are thinking, dont assume. I think i finally woke up this time which i am very happy about (:

June 2009:
Oh geez, what a month June was! I was babysitting a 19 month old everyday from 7-6. Lesson Learned: I dont want kids for a REALLY REALLY LONG TIME!

July 2009:
There was a boy. Who lied to me. I learned that if i dont stand my ground, people will try to take advantage of me. I stood my ground, he thought i wouldnt, when i realized i was, he left. bye-bye (: I look back on that know and wonder what the heck i was doing dating someone like that. However i'm pretty sure i was warned...but you know me, i dont listen to anyone ever. haa.

August 2009:
August was a happy month. I finally woke up and realized what was right in front of my face (go back to january) and i got over myself and went for it. And i'm glad i did, i'm know exactly where i was when it hit me, and i thought it was to late. But it wasnt (: Lesson learned: go after what you want.

September 2009: this month was okay...i guess you could say over this month and the next few i learned alot about who my true friends are. Who will be there for me no matter what and who kinda shuts ya out when things get tough.

October 2009: October was good, until the last day that is. Halloween...oh how halloween got me in trouble. I learned my lesson and am still paying the consequences of that one. Hurt alot of relationships it seems like. I learned that one decision that you think isnt that big of a deal (not that it wasnt a big deal...but like I didnt think the result would be what it was) can turn into something really big and can hurt alot of people. So this month i learned that i can't just think about what i want and what i want to do. I also learned that alot of the time other people know whats best, because they see things differently than what you do. I learned this, now applying it im still working on. Because anyone who knows me knows that i am about as hard headed as they come and i have to learn EVERYTHING the hard way.

November 2009: Tough month. Dealing w/ the previous month...i was pretty much miserable. I learned that people do come around...kinda. That i need to make my own decisions and make them wisely, so that my decision making isnt doubted in the future. If that makes sense.

Decemeber: Well I'm still in this month. And now im just thinking about where i was sitting this time last year. After reading this, you might think it sounds like a typical year, but its def been a whirlwind. EVERYTHING is different. If you would tell me I would be where I am now, I would prob laugh at you. Makes me wonder where i will be this time next year...i have some ideas. But I have learned from this year that things never go the way you think they will. I would never say that i wasted time this year....because i truly believe we dont waste time, because at the time that is something that we really wanted. I have learned SO MUCH this year....its crazy. Its crazy how timing works out perfectly...just blows my mind completely.