I cannot to begin to explain to you this feeling that i have. I figured that with time, it would go away. But it hasn't, and i'm not quite sure what to do about it. I know how to fix the problem, but i can't fix the problem while i am still living in my house. So do i hope it goes away, or just deal with it forever till i move out? Neither of which i really want to do...
I need to talk about all this. But once agian...i can't. I need a clear answer of what to do...and i pray...and nothing. Its beginning to get very frustrating to me.
And it doesnt help the fact that while i have all this going on...i have good things and bad things happening as well. And it makes it difficult to complain about the bad things when i know about the good things. if that makes any sense? And dont get me wrong, i am very grateful for the good things (aka my new babiessss) but it makes it hard to enjoy when i have so much other stuff on my mind.
Once agian...this all comes down to the fact that i dont like to be told what to do and how to do it. I'm stubborn, and i like to figure things out on my own. I can't do that with this situation...and i am really really wishing i could. For as many reasons that i have to be happy, im not happy. For anything you have to think or say about that last statement...please keep it to yourself. That is the way i am feeling at the moment...and no one else probably understands it.
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